Find a way
by MorgauseNokami
Summary: Sequel to On The Outside. Who's that collecting the dragonballs? Juunanagou! Now why the hell would he do that? And Pan, in what mess are you now? J-P.
1. Chapter 1: Riddles

Pan looked in the mirror, studying her face, her body

**FIND A WAY**

** **

by Morgause

** **

**chapter 1: Riddles**

Pan looked in the mirror, studying her face, her body. Carefully she touched her swollen lips, let her hand travel down her chin, neck, to rest on her chest. 

She was a woman now. 

Did she look more mature?..

She doubted it. Even on the inside she didn't feel different. 

Would Trunks notice it? Would he finally see her as a woman now?

Probably not. She couldn't see any difference, so why would he? 

Trunks. 

He hadn't been her first.

He hadn't been the one to show her, teach her, drive her crazy with his touch.

A stranger had.

She was supposed to feel horrible about that, but she didn't. Strangely enough she couldn't care less. 

He had been her substitute for love, as he had said. So in a way, she _had_ been with Trunks.

She surpressed that thought.

No, she had not. She wouldn't make any mistakes about this night. It was her night, hers and her mysterious lover's.

She looks at him through half lidded eyes, her breathing ragged. He slowly lifts his hand to catch a sweatdrop rolling down her face. He looks at it and smiles sadly, suddenly not participating anymore. 

Frowning she kisses him, trying to get him to respond. Luckily, he does so and she gets lost in those feelings again. 

And again.

And again.

_God_ it had been good, _he_ had been good, way better than she had expected. She had really enjoyed (ok, that word didn't really cover how she felt about it, but she couldn't find a better word) it, unlike she had thought she would.

Didn't everybody always say sex wasn't near as good with just somebody than with someone you loved?

_Hell_, how much better could it get?!

Trunks. 

She did love him, truely. She had since that day, about three years ago, when she had first realised what love really was. 

She had loved him since then, but had never done anything, tried anything. Trunks often said how good of a friend she was.

He just saw her as a friend, a second baby sister at the most. 

_God_, why couldn't she just stop loving him?!

And then she'd met up with ... Him again. Her mystery man. 

And even though she loved Trunks so much, she couldn't help but feel extremely attracted to this guy. Boy, really – he was no older than she was. 

At least his body showed no signs of aging, no signs of anything wrong really. He was perfect.

But his eyes... his pale blue eyes. In those eyes she could see he had been through a lot. They looked so sad sometimes, so distracted.

But when they focussed on her, they burned with a strange kind of fire, a strange emotion she had never seen in anyones eyes when they looked at her. 

It had been his eyes that had drawn her to him. Unasked questions, denied emotions, all flickering behind those eyes. 

And everything she saw in those eyes she recognised.

She looked at her mirror again, inspected herself. Her slim body, now uncovered, didn't seem to be able to hold the power it contained. Her long black hair cascaded down her back. Her eyes were dark as always, although they shimmered with something unknown.

A tear? 

  
She didn't cry. She never cried. 

And why should she cry? There was nothing she felt upset about, at the moment. 

It fell down from her eye, leaving a moist trail on her cheek.

Silently she moved her hand up to wipe it away. She did not make any sound, did not even shed another tear. She just cried on the inside, not knowing why.

***

He hovered in the shadows, not seen, not heard, not sensed.

And he watched the girl, who was standing in front of her mirror, her eyes shimmering, her lips quivering. 

She was crying.

This disturbed him deeply. Why would she cry? He hadn't hurt her, had he?

No, he had not hurt her. He had been ever so careful. Besides, she was saiyajin, she could stand almost everything.

In fact, he had given her pleasure, he concluded as he recalled her cries, her moans, her mouth and hands and body asking him for more. 

His heart ached, his whole body ached to fly into that room and do whatever it took to make her stop crying.

Only the last little bit of brains he still had kept him from doing so. 

Logical decisions.

Careful considerations.

Yeah right.

He narrowed his eyes to look at her, see her for the last time, turned, and blasted away.

There had to be _something_ that could make his love possible.

*****

"Yo, Pan!" 

Pan couldn't help but smile. That voice she would recognise anywhere. Bra was a good friend of hers, she had been since the day they first met and even more when Bra'd finally given in to her saiyajin nature and had decided to use her powers and train properly, instead of nearly blowing someones head off accidently because that someone pissed her off (luckily the first time it had been her brother, who could defend himself just in time). Pan loved to spar with her, Bra was like Vegeta – strong, but especially smart. She used little tricks that caused much more damage than Pan's powerful attacks, because Bra was so much faster. It made Pan train harder to keep up with her. Bra was a demi saiyajin, which made her more powerful by nature.

Only this night they wouldn't be sparring, they would be doing normal friends stuff. Which meant they would go watch a movie in Bra's room, sleep over and talk. 

In this case, unfortunately, they would talk about where the hell she had been last night.

"Hi, Bra," Pan said, looking into Bulma's lab. "What are you doing?"

The blue haired girl looked up from the little device she was working on. 

"I'm trying to fix my remote control. It broke again, and it's not the batteries. I think Trunks purposedly stepped on it when he walked in last night. 

You were pacing by so fast, I thought I'd call you. You forgot to check the ki around here _again_."

Pan blushed. "I know, I'm sorry. I was thinking."

Bra frowned, a concerned look in her eyes. "You seem to do that a lot, lately, don't you?" 

Pan sighed. "I guess so. Everything is just so complicated lately...." 

"Do you mind talking here? I can't stand not having my remote control!"

Pan snickered. She knew Bra just couldn't stand the fact she hadn't finished it yet, and if there was _something_ Bra had inherited from Vegeta, it was obstinacy (besides the 'having natural powers' part, that is).

"Sure, if there's somewhere I can sit," she said. 

Bra nodded at a nearby standing desk. "You can sit there."

****

From what he knew, this green guy was supposed to know everything. At least everything involving this world, and that was (hopefully, he couldn't help but add) enough. 

He dropped down in front of him and looked at him, keeping his face blank.

The namek smiled amiably, which irritated him greatly. 

"Can I help you, Juunanagou?" he asked friendly, still smiling like that. 

Juunanagou felt an urge to smack him in the face, but he surpressed it. Smacking the kami was no good, not even for him. And besides, he did need the green guy's help, even though he didn't like to admit it. 

"I need to know two things," he said gruffly. 

Dende lifted one eyebrow. 

"First; Is it possible for me to make this ... whatever it is I'm feeling... " – he really didn't feel comfortable with the word 'love' –" ... possible? Can it happen?"

Dende smiled again, that friendly smile that irritated him so much, but this time something sparkled in his eyes. Something he didn't really like.

Could a god be sneaky?!

"You have to tell what exactly it is you want to happen."

Yes, a god _could_ be sneaky. 

"You like torturing, don't you?!" Juunanagou snapped, coming closer, a strange electric aura appearing around him. 

"Naah, just a little teasing," said the namek, still smiling, not the least bit scared. 

Juunanagou growled low in his throat, but stepped back.

No killing the kami.

Under no conditions kill the kami.

When the god kept quiet, he stepped forward again.

"Well?! Can it happen?!!" he snapped. 

"You mean your love?!"

Juunanagou narrowed his eyes dangerously, but Dende didn't even blink. 

"If love is involved, anything can happen," he then said mysteriously. 

Juunanagou surpressed the urge to blast the guy to hell. Great, this didn't bring him any closer. He had come here for information, not riddles!

"And your second question?" asked Dende, polite as always – 'though Juunanagou was sure he could see something really evil flicker behind the Namek's eyes.

"Is it useful for me to try to make anything happen?" 

"Useful? Like in – does _she_ want this? This too you have to find out yourself. I can't just give you all the information you want, just because you can fly up here."

Juunanagou growled again, a bestial sound he didn't even know he could make. 

The kami smiled again, but this time with something like compassion in his eyes. 

"Love will _always_ find a way. Just remember that, Juunanagou," he said.

And gave him the sphere.

$*%**^_^**%*$

Author's notes:this was only chapter one, really!! I thought I'd better stop making sequels to sequels to sequels to sequels, and this way I can bring more out sooner.

I figured I'd keep my fans (yup, you three ^_^) happy and write this – I had something out already, but I've been really busy with school lately. In fact, I have to study right now – but I decided not to. I can't stand it anymore.

Soooo, I finished this first chapter to make y'all happy ^___^

You can thank me by reviewing, but I won't beg you for reviews – don't want 'em _that_ badly ~_^.

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball Z/GT or any of it's characters, Akira Toriyama, Bird Studios, etc etc etc does. I just like messing with their (love) lives!! 

hihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihih (as in *evil snickering*)


	2. Chapter 2: The way to love

FIND A WAY

FIND A WAY

** **

by Morgause

**Chapter 2: The way to love**

** **

Pan sighed as she looked at her long time friend. 

"Bra, have you ever been in love? Really in love?" she asked quietly.

Bra looked up from her remote control, locking her gaze to Pan's. 

"No, I haven't," she said, her voice clear. But Pan was sure she saw something flicker in her friend's eyes... something sad.

"I wish I never had," she sighed. 

Bra looked at her compassionately. "This has something to do with Trunks again?"

Pan closed her eyes. "Among others."

Bra stood up, leaving her remote control alone, and walked over to her friend. 

"You know, Pan, you can't keep on waiting for him. He's not worth it."

"Why wouldn't he be?!" Pan remarked, annoyed. 

Bra sighed. "Because he will never see you the way you see him. It's no use waiting for someone who doesn't even know you're waiting. He doesn't see you that way and he won't. I wish he would, just because it would make you happy, but he doesn't. Please Pan, at least _try_ to get over him."

Pan looked up at her, a sad half smile on her face. "I'm trying, Bra." 

Bra pushed her aside and dropped down on the desk next to her. 

"And now tell me about last night. Where the hell have you been?! If I hadn't felt your ki, I might have told your father you were missing. Now I just gathered you were doing something..." Bra's eyes flickered almost diabolically satisfied by this fact, "... naughty."

Pan blushed and looked sideways at her friend. "Why do you immediately think I'm doing something... naughty?!" 

Bra grinned. "For one because your ki has risen to some high points I'm sure Gohan would have picked up wouldn't he have been busy with ... other stuff, and besides, it's full moon."

Pan turned even redder at the remark of her ki, but her curiosity was peeked. 

"What do you mean, full moon?" 

"Oh, you know, the regular stuff, saiyajin getting excited and more instinctive, wanting to mate and stuff," Bra said airily. 

Pan frowned, but decided she didn't want to know.

"But anyways, where have you been? With _whom_ have you been?!"

Pan still blushed and looked at the floor. "Well, I just was... Uhm, you know..."

Bra chuckled. "With whom?"

Ouch, sensitive point. Pan thought her head would soon burst with all the blood flowing to it. 

"With whom?" Bra repeated, looking at her questioningly. 

"A tall dark and incredibly handsome guy," Pan said in the end, getting annoyed with the look in Bra's eyes.

"His name?" continued Bra, smiling in a way Pan didn't really like. 

"No."

"Ah, why won't you give it to me?" She bent closer. "Do I know him?"

"No! At least I don't think you do," said Pan, frowning. 

"Then why won't you give me his name?" Bra smiled sweetly.

"Because... Just because!" Pan said, furiously blushing. 

"Oh my gosh Pan don't say you don't even know his name!" Bra threw out and choked back a laugh when she saw Pan startle.

"Pan! You really did loose your virginity to someone you don't even know?!" 

Pan elbowed her in the ribs. "Stop it, Bra! It's not like that!"

"Oh? Then what is it like?" Bra asked, still chuckling. 

"I kinda know him already. I just don't... I never asked his name. I want it to be... I want _him_ to be... anonymus. Secret. My secret, my night. A perfect memory, not spoiled by anything like dates that never will work out because I can't stop thinking about you-know-who," Pan explained, frowning as if she was still considering it herself.

"A perfect memory? He must have been good!" smiled Bra evilly.

"Oh boy, if you just knew!!" Pan said dreamily. "He is the best kisser I've ever met, and if I told you what he can do with his hands..."

"Ok, ok, hold it! Too much information!!" laughed Bra. "I really don't wanna know." 

Pan grinned, but didn't say anything else. She just dreamt away on the memories of last night.

@-@-@

Juunanagou frowned at the sky, for turning dark on him before he had found what he had been looking for. Not that he really needed daylight to see, but he found it pleasant to act at least a little human and sleep at night.

Thus he dropped out of the air and saddled down for the night.

Strong arms encirceling him, strong hands caressing the back of his neck, shoulders. His own hands on that soft firm body that didn't seem to hold that strength it possessed, caressing her back. Her sweet lips on his, her tongue teasing him, driving him insane with its light touch. It would be hours until sunrise, and he already regretted it to be over so soon. He needed a lifetime, not a night, to figure out just what he was feeling, what to do about it and how to tell her.

Groaning he woke up from the arousing dream, only to find it was hours before sunrise yet. Not able to wait any longer, he stood up and flew into the direction of what he'd been looking for. He didn't need a dragon radar, his hypersensitive senses could sense the dragonballs already.

Only six more to go.

Just one wish to carefully and perfectly word.

@-@-@

Pan stared into the distance. Bra was messing with her remote control again (by now, Pan was sure she had broken it instead of fixed) and Pan was trying to stop thinking.

Strangely enough she wasn't thinking about mister saiyajin prince. Well, she almost wasn't. 

She kept on remeniscing last night. The way his soft silky hair felt on her bare skin; the way he looked at her, his pale eyes halflidded with lust and something else, something she couldn't describe, couldn't really figure out; the way he made her feel just by touching her...

And every now and then she was _sure_ she could feel the way _he_ felt, his uncertainty, how nervous he was, but also how much he really cared about her.

"Pan, did you ever consider the fact you might have bonded to my brother?" Bra then said, not even looking up from her work.

"Bonded? What... what do you mean?" Pan startled.

"Bonded, you know. Like love, but deeper. Worse. Or better, as some might say."

Pan frowned. Deeper than love? It _would_ explain why she still wasn't over him.

"This... bonding thing, how long does it take to wear off?" 

Bra chuckled, but it sounded humorlessly. "It doesn't wear off. Bonding is forever."

"_forever_?!!" Pan shouted, almost choking. "You can't seriously say I'm gonna feel like this my _whole life_!?!"

Bra sighed. "That's the bonding crap. Ofcourse, when it's returned, it's not that bad. Just imagine; he will never go away from you, you always know where he is and even what he's feeling; he will never fall in love with someone else, he won't even _think_ about cheating..."

Pan sighed of relief. "Than I'm not bonded."

Bra frowned. "Why not?"

Pan chuckled, blushing slightly. "Last night, you know..."

Bra giggled. "Well ok, I guess you're not bonded then. That's a good thing."

Pan shrugged and jumped up. "Just what is _in_ this desk anyway?" she changed the subject. 

"Stuff my mom kept over the years. Information of Cell and stuff, I dunno exactly. Whenever I come here I make up my mind to take a look at it, but I'm always too busy, or I forget," Bra said. 

Pan chuckled and tried to open the doors of the desk. It opened.

"Can I take a look?" she asked, getting really curious now.

"Sure, if my mom wouldn't want anyone to see it, she would have put a lock on it," Bra said, trying out her remote control (which was useless since there was no tv close).

Pan carefully took out the large amounts of paper work and took a peep at the paper on top. 

Just a lot of numbers Pan couldn't place, so she put it aside and picked another paper up.

This one described exactly how Goku turned into a super saiyajin on Namek. It was rather interesting, so Pan read it all.

Dissapointed she noticed the other half of the story was gone, so she flipped a few pages again.

Drawing in a sharp breath, Pan leaned back.

From the page in front of her a familiar face with dark, silky hair at shoulder length and cold, pale blue eyes looked at her. 

Notes were written all over the paper and picture, most of them existing out of strange numbers and codes she didn't know.

However, there was one note that drew her attention.

_Artificial human number seventeen_.

$*%**^_^**%*$

AN: Uhuh, yup yup, I know, it's short... But I just wrote it today. I can't help it, I'm better at writing short stories. Now the short stories have turned into short chapters... but hey, they make a long fic, don't they?? ^_^ (ok even I don't understand that logic... I just love rambling *snickers*) 

Hmz but anyway, if I'm keeping this up, the fic might be finished next week (just don't count on it, cuz I may get distracted by... certain things... persons... *coughs*).

Oh yeah, and thanx for your lovely reactions (on all my J-P fics). It started out with Walking in the rain, but turned into much more, and after Substitute For Love I caved in and promised to make it a real J-P.... 

Also I have had some peeps telling me they were fans number four... This would make about 8 fans now ~_^ (they've made me happy ^_________^)

DISCLAIMER: Hellohooo, if I owned Juunanagou, did you really think I would write fanfiction about him? On the contrary!! *evil snickering*

I just love messing with their lovelifes when mine isn't as I want it to be... (too bad writing romances doesn't go as well when your own lovelife is going fine... ~_^ like mine at the moment ~_^ but I won't bother you with _that_....)


	3. Chapter 3: Outcomes?

FIND A WAY

FIND A WAY

** **

by Morgause

**Chapter 3: Outcomes?**

** **

Finally, he'd found the sphere. Scowling he swam to the surface, holding the six star ball close to him. He'd been looking for the damned thing for hours. Even though he sensed the exact location of the dragon ball, it took him long to find it. A recent landslide had buried the sphere deep down and he hadn't dared to blast all the rocks to ashes – too affraid he might destroy the dragonball as well and ruin all his chances of ... he still didn't feel comfortable with the word. 

So, he had carefully lifted each rock (and thrown it away with all his power) until he had found the thing.

He hadn't gone up to the surface to breath at all. 

Ofcourse he hadn't, he didn't need to. He could go one for hours without breathing, days probably. The very few completely organical parts he had were provided with oxigen, and other matters he needed, by his mechanical and bio-chemical parts. He was almost completely selfsufficient. 

_God_ he hated it.

But only three more dragonballs to go.

Only a few more days, and his dreams would come true.... Or his nightmares.

%^_^%

"B.. Bra?" Pan noticed the tremble in her voice and hated herself for it.

"Bra? Who is this?" 

Bra glanced at the paper. "Oh, that's Juunanagou. You know, android seventeen. Marron's mom's brother. My mom got that paper from Mirai no Trunks back before the Cell Games."

She grinned evilly, one eyebrow arched. "He's quite the cuty, huh?"

Pan still looked at the picture, her eyes widened, her mouth open. Finally Bra noticed her being completely perplexed. 

"What? You seen him before or something? I have no idea what he's doing now... I don't think even Juuhachigou knows where he's been lately... My mom doesn't really know him and my dad hates him, so..."

Pan blinked a few times and tried to regain focus. _Artificial human number seventeen_. _I've had sex with an_ android, _for god's sake._

_My dad and family's enemy. The one who wanted to kill my grandfather._

_I've heard many stories about him... Cold and calculated._

_He was nothing like that, last night. He's_ not _cold. Not at all._

_Great. Finally I've found some kind of substitute for Trunks and now this. Why don't I ever fall for normal guys?_

"Pan? Are you even listening?" Bra frowned.

Pan nodded, although she hadn't heard a word of what Bra'd been saying. 

"Well, as I said he's nowhere to be found because androids don't have ki. If, or when, he doesn't want to be found, he's not gonna be found."

Pan raised her eyebrows. No ki! That's why she couldn't sense him. And she wouldn't be able to find him too...

Why would she wanna find him anyway?! Pan mentally kicked her own ass. 

_A night! Just a night! Don't start thinking you might fall in love with this one, Pan. You never have before, even though there have been some guys you thought might be the one._

_But it felt so right!..._

_It was just sex._ Just sex. _Don't get desillusional. Sex is_ not _love._ _Get those idea's out of your head, Pan. He's not the one. Trunks is, even though he doesn't feel that way. Besides, he – Juunanagou._ Number seventeen. – _has_ told _you he didn't want to fall in love, couldn't even fall in love._ _He's an android. He doesn't have feelings. It was nothing for him, like it was nothing for you. A nice memory. Besides, he's immortal. He'll outlive you, and being left behind is for him even worse than not loving at all._

_But he said he cared..._

"Really, Pan, you're not paying any attention at all today. What _is_ the matter with you?!" 

Pan shrugged and looked at her friend apologetically. "I really don't know, Bra. I'm distracted. Maybe I'd just go and try to sort things out, and I'll meet you tomorrow again. That way I won't be so bad of a friend."

Bra looked her in the eyes. "You sure, Pan? I mean, don't you need someone to talk to?"

Pan shook her head. "Thanks, Bra, but I think it's best I think this through first. I'll tell you everything tomorrow, okay?"

Bra nodded. "Take your time. And stop thinking about my brother, kay?"

Pan smiled. _It's not him I'm thinking about at the moment._

"I will, Bra."

She jumped out of the window and in the air. Flying always cooled her down and she could need that right now.

%^_^%

Dende smiled when he looked down at the earth. "Love is a fascinating thing, isn't it, mister Popo?" 

The genie nodded. "It is, Dende."

The young namek sighed. "I sometimes regret I don't and won't know it, not that way. It seems so... worth every price you pay."

Mister Popo did not speak. Only when they could see someone swiftly flying up Korrin's tower he said: "A visitor, Dende."

The kami nodded. "And one more comes up here to find the answers he needs."

He sighed again. "I just wish we had the answers."

%^_^%

The last one! It had taken him longer than he'd expected. The waning moon stood already high in the sky. There were almost no clouds and the air was cool, but not chilly.

A perfect night to summon the dragon.

Besides, at night it would probably take the Z-fighters a while to get here (they had the most irritating habit of appearing whenever someone summoned the dragon to interfere with whatever wishes the summoner had) and he could make his wish before they'd stop him. 

He carefully placed the dragonballs on the ground.

"Arise, great dragon, and grant my wishes!" he then shouted. And waited for Shenlong to appear.

%^_^%

Dende studied the girl in front of him. She had no clue someone was about to wish himself mortal for her. And even if she did, she might not really care.

"Can I help you, Pan?" he asked.

Pan nodded, then shrugged. "I'm not sure. I... was going to ask you where I could find Juunanagou."

Dende smiled and lay his hand on her arm.

"I'm not supposed to tell this, but you'd better hurry that way, to be in time to hear him make his wish. Shenlong's ki will mask yours – you have to be careful, he must not notice you."

Pan nodded, very curious, and blasted away in the direction Dende had pointed. Luckily it wasn't too far away where she suddenly spotted Shenlong's huge ki.

Just _what_ was he gonna wish for?!

Mister Popo glared at the young kami, his eyes full of disapprobation. Dende looked at him wide-eyed, his hands lifted, a picture of total innocence. "What? I didn't do anything!"

The genie just snorted – a _very_ un-Popo like sound, I must add – and turned away.

Smiling secretly Dende glanced back down on earth. The more interesting part was now to come.

%^_^%

"What is your wish, mortal?" boomed Shenlong's deep and very loud voice.

"I wish myself to have a lifespan as long as than Pan's. I wish to age and die as her, and preferably with her." 

A tingling feeling rushed through him. In less than a moment it was over, and he waas feeling like his normal self again.

Not completely. He felt like he was being watched, even though he didn't sense anything – which was fairly impossible anyway, with Shenlong's ki blocking all other ki out.

"Your wish has been granted. Tell me your next wish."

Juunanagou looked up at the incredibly big dragon. "I don't have another wish. You may go, great dragon." He smirked before he added: "Have a nice day."

Shenlong snorted and dissapeared.

%^_^%

Pan bit her lip as she stared at the android. Had he just given up immortality and youth for her?! Why the hell would he do _that_?!!

The possible answer scared her immoderately.

He twirled around and looked her straight into the eyes. She couldn't help but blush. He looked so damned cute!! 

"Pan!" he said, breathless. 

He knew her name. He must have known all the time. After all, he was familiar with her family, and she wasn't exactly the most unknown girl in the world, with her grandfather being the great hero and all.

"How... how long have you been here?" 

Pan bit her lip again. "I've heard everything." 

Juunanagou nodded. He seemed utterly calm, but she could just _feel_ him being nervous. 

"I was gonna talk to you, I just didn't plan it so soon..." 

Yup, cute was definately the right word at this time. She wondered if he was gonna blush, and silently snickered in spite of the seriousness of the moment. 

"I..." he started, but he didn't know what to say.

For the first time in his life he was at loss of words.

"I'm..." he started again, but was cut short this time by Pan. "Juu... Juunanagou, don't say anything, please. I need to think first."

  
He nodded slowly. "Then think. And when you've thought enough, come to me. You will know how to find me."

He looked deeply into her eyes. "You will _always_ know how to find me." 

She tore her eyes away from his and fled.

%^_^%

Trunks paced up and down the lane. Unfortunately he had been in the room next to the laboratiory and he had accidently overheard Bra and Pan's entire conversation.

And now he was completely freaked out.

He had never _ever_ thought she would think of him this way. She had _never_ showed any interest him other than a friend. And that they were, friends. Good friends, but just friends.

That was why Trunks'd been so frustrated lately. 

In only a moment he had suddenly noticed how Pan's hair shone, how her eyes sparkled, how attractive her body just was and how great she smelled.

She'd hunted him in his dreams for weeks now. He couldn't help it. He knew he was too old for her, and that he was a sick pedophile by thinking of her this way. But he just couldn't help it. She looked, felt and smelled amazing to him and there was nothing that could change his mind about that. 

And then this... 

She loved him. She was actually in love with him. She'd said she loved him.

And now he didn't know what to do. He had to talk with her. He had to tell her what _he_ felt. Tell her she didn't need to banish her thoughts of him out of her head. Tell her how much he wanted her.

He found her almost immediately when he reached out with his ki sense and quickly took off in her direction. 

If she just...

$*%**^_^**%*$

  
  


AN: Oh _boy_ am I cruel!! *snickers evilly*. Hadn't expected _that_ one, did ya?! Who says it's gonna be a Juunanagou-Pan? I might just as well make it a Trunks-Pan again,.... 

You'll find out next chapter (which is probably gonna be the last chapter) ~_^ _what_ it's gonna be. And how. And when. And... 

oh well, just wait and see. I've probably finished this in a week (maybe even tonight, when I can kick my dad of the computer), so it shouldn't be too long. 

And oh yeah, it's 14 fans now!! *cheers* I just _love_ you guys ~_^

Disclaimer: Don't feel like making one.


	4. Chapter 4: Always and forever

FIND A WAY

FIND A WAY

** **

by Morgause

**Chapter 4: Always and forever**

** **

Pan landed on the beach and let herself drop in the sand. She sighed and closed her eyes. Whenever she felt depressed, angry or just bad, she came here to calm down. Nobody else came here, it was about as far in the middle of nowhere you could get. Only Bra knew of the place and even she didn't come here when Pan was, because she knew Pan needed to be alone then.

The cool night breeze and the sound of the waves relaxed her a little and she started recollecting her thoughts. 

He just gave up his eternal youth for her. 

_No._

He'd been an enemy.

He'd been the sweetest guy she'd ever even kissed with.

He'd been her first.

He just gave up eternal youth for her. 

_No! No, stop it. You can bring on all kinds of excuses, but you can't deny the fact that you don't love him. You love Trunks. You can't lead him on, play along, and still love Trunks. It's not fair, not for you and not for him!_

She moaned and rolled on her stomach. Why did she keep on thinking about this? She should forget about the whole thing for a while, maybe that that would get her somewhere.

She slowly stood up and pulled off her clothes. Maybe taking a swim would get her mind off this.

%^$^%

A dark shadow suddenly appeared in front of her in the waves. It scared the hell out of her and she jumped back gasping, to end up almost choking due to the water she'd accidentally swallowed. Only then a familiar soothing voice calmed her down, and she scowled up at him.

"Trunks! You scared the shit out of me!" 

His low, soft laugh made her knees melt as always, and that fact pissed her off more than she could have thought. 

"What the hell are you doing here?!" she said,huffy. 

"I needed to talk to you," he said, looking deeply into her eyes. 

Pan raised her brows at the look he was giving her. It almost seemed like...

"In the dark in a sea isn't really the best place and time, you know," she remarked dryly.

"Well..." Trunks looked down his body. He still had his clothes on and he was completely soaked. "You might be right. I just wanted to surprise you, that's all."

"You sure did," she muttered. "Well, let's get out. Whatever you want to say can wait until we're on the beach." 

She levitated out of the water and quickly powered up, thus drying her body and underwear. Then she flew to the beach and put her clothes back on.

Trunks was sitting in the sand, waiting for her to finish getting dressed. When she was done, she dropped down next to him.

"So, what did you wanna talk to me about?" she asked, throwing her hair over her shoulder.

"Well... it's kind of complicated," he began. 

Pan cocked her head. "Spit it out, boxer boy. What have you done now?!" 

He actually blushed, what naturally made Pan chuckle. 

"Well... I've not done anything... I.... just had something to say to you." 

Pan frowned. Normally, when Trunks wanted to talk to her, he'd done something stupid that he needed to discuss with her, so that she could give him advice. He never came to her to just _say_ something to her.

"What is it, then?" she asked.

He said nothing, just studied her face. Eventually it began to unnerve her. What was so strange in her face that needed to be watched like this?

"Trunks?" she asked uncertainly.

  
She saw him moving closer, laying his hand on her cheek. Was he gonna do what she thought he was gonna do? Her stomach curled uncomfortably. She vaguely noticed that she moisted her lips, in anticipation of what was coming. 

He was close now, so close she could taste his breath on her lips. She saw him closing his eyes, and did the same. This was the moment she'd been waiting for for years.

%^$^%

Juunanagou sighed when his vision blurred. An aching feeling developed in his lower abdomen and spread out through his whole body. In vain. It had all been in vain. He had hoped so much, longed so much, _loved_ so much, but it had been useless. 

The mere sight of him kissing her made his heart ache so badly he wanted to lay down and die. It didn't only affect him on an emotional level, but it also touched him phsysically – something he had never considered possible. Now he understood why people fought, even though they would never win, to try and save their beloved ones. And why people gave up, even when they had a great chance of winning, just because it wasn't worth it anymore.

He'd gotten to that point now. But it was the point of no return for him – he could not undo his actions, nor could he undo his feelings. Which he terribly regretted right now, because being so hurt by such a diminutive action was _not_ a thing he really liked. 

%^$^%

The moment his lips touched hers Pan knew something was wrong. It was not him – his lips were soft, warm, and when his tongue slid in she noticed he was quite a good kisser too – but something really uncomfortable washed over her. An aching feeling in her stomach, a growing urge to push Trunks – Trunks! The guy she'd been waiting for for years! The guy she'd _loved_ for years!! – away from her. And the moment she felt it she knew it was him. Juunanagou. _Number seventeen._ He was making her feel this way.

No. It was not that he made _her_ feel this way, but that she made _him_ feel this way. Somehow though it was returned. 

Somehow she felt exactly what he felt.

It was only when she realised _that_ that she did push him away. 

Trunks looked at her with hurt. "Wh… what? I… Shouldn't I have done that? I thought you…" 

Pan breathed in shuddering. "Trunks… I… I can't. I've waited years for this moment, but now I can't. I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" She turned and blasted away, leaving Trunks with emotions she couldn't really care about now.

%^$^%

"Juunanagou! Wait!"

She saw him startle and turn to look at her. 

Only his eyes were enough to make her wanna go up to him and beg for forgiveness. He seemed so hurt! She did not, ofcourse – she was too proud to do so. But the feeling stayed.

"You seem to have made your decision?" he asked. His voice was as cool and calculated as any time, but she could feel him blazing and burning on the inside. 

"Don't jump into conclusions, Juunana," she said coolly. 

"Well, kissing him seems to me like a choice!" he said, his voice if possible even colder. "I don't think I'm jumping into conclusions!" 

"_Why the hell do you think I ran away?!!_" she shouted, outraged. "It was you! I couldn't even kiss the one I've loved for years because you were feeling like hell and that made me feel the same way!!" 

His eyes widened at her outburst, but then he frowned. "You only left because it would make me feel bad? I don't need compassion. I don't need _pity_. Please, go back to him then." The look in his eyes changed to painfully. "I'd prefer you being happy with him than unhappy because of me." 

She sighed and flashed a half smile. "I wasn't being compassionate. I just felt the exact same thing you were feeling, which was pain, at the moment. I still do. And if you're paying attention, you'd probably feel exactly what I'm feeling to." 

She looked into his eyes, those pale blue eyes that could burn with so much fire when they looked at her.

He was still considering what she had said. "And what does that mean?" he asked in the end, still frowning.

Pan drew in a deep breath. She'd been thinking about what it meant the whole time, but she could only come up with the same thing again and again. And it was not that she didn't want it, it was just so unexpected. She'd never thought she'd actually ever get over Trunks... And that one night in the park would do the job.

She must have been really lucky to find the right guy at once.

"It meanst you'll never get rid of me anymore," she finally said, smiling tentatively.

In one fluid movement he came to her and took her in his arms. Holding her close and burying his face in her hair he said: "Good. That's the way I want it." 

She warmed herself in his embrace. "I ... I suppose I love you, Juu." 

He embraced her tighter, then kissed her. 

"I love you too, Pan. Always and forever." 

#*~_^*$*%**^___^**%*$*^_~*# 

AN: And finally, it's finished! I hope y'all had fun, I sure did ~_^. It was a pleasure writing for you and I wanna thank my fans (yup yup, there are 8 already!!) for supporting me this well and being there with every chapter, encouraging (threatening ~_^) me to get on with it and bring out something more... Thanks to you I actually finished this. 

Now I can go on writing T-P again ~_^

And oh yeah, I did not try to bring Juunanagou out of character. It's not really clear in this fic, but Juunana is only nice an' all around Pan. Around other's he still is (or tries to be) cold and calculated. (Maybe, _maybe_ I'll someday write some-sort-of-sequel to make that clearer........ *hides for angry T-P fans who can't stand this li'l J-P hobby of mine*)

Also I don't know a thing about the Super Seventeen stuff cuz I haven't seen GT (poor li'l Dutch girl – they don't air it in Holland). So I just pretended the whole GT stuff didn't happen and they lived fairly normal lifes (for Z-senshi, that is ~_^)or something like that... or that Juunanagou survived the super seventeen crap... (if anyone wants to tell me just *what* happened then, please do)

I hope I didn't piss too many people off by not using the correct storyline (I know it pisses _me_ of to see people just forget about whole events that happened, just to make their story right...Especially when they just change the ages or the environment and stuff.

But when I started this whole series I didn't even know he'd died. 

Ok that was my really long author's notes.... Thanks for reading and make sure to come back for more (if it's T-P or J-P...), I'm surely not gonna stop writing!!


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